This week over 800 top military brass summoned from near and far gathered to hear speeches by Donald Trump and “Secretary of War” Hegseth. And while the officers appeared calm and unmoved at what they heard, the speeches themselves were unhinged. This post focuses on Hegseth’s speech, which addressed “the warrior ethos “and his “vision” of America’s military’s future.
He opened with a redundant and tiresome message: peace means preparing for war and letting our enemies know “FAFO”, which he suggested the high-falutin’ brass might ask their troops to translate for them. Turns out it means “F*ck around and find out.” Whoa! Those generals and admirals scalps must have been tingling! “Don’t mess with this Hegseth guy! Can’t wait to use FAFO when we occupy Chicago!” Quite a vision for a world where German Chancellor Friedrich Merz said on Monday “Europe is not at war…but no longer at peace with Russia.” FAFO about that one, Vlad! What, Donald, you and Vlad are bffs? FAFO NATO! Now that’s has got a fine, leaderly ring to it! “Should our enemies choose foolishly to challenge us, they will be crushed by the violence, precision, and ferocity of the War Department.” FAFO- indeed.
However, Hegseth also castigated the military for “decades of decay” due to “woke garbage” and “overbearing rules of engagement”. For too long promotions have been “based on…race…on gender quotas,” while “we’ve weeded out so-called toxic leaders [i.e, toxic masculinity] …promoting risk-averse…conformists instead.” Imagine! The 24 percent of active-duty U.S. women experiencing sexual assault while serving in Afghanistan could have been even higher if we hadn’t been so busy rooting out toxic masculinity!
He also enthused that our military is “the strongest, most powerful, most lethal, and most prepared military on the planet. That is true, full stop. Nobody can touch us. It’s not even close.” Yes, “full stop”, the very same military that has been rotting in wokeness for years is suddenly the most lethal in history, a status Hegseth attributed to “the investments he [Trump] made in his first term.” And Pete wants to continue this legacy with more of everything: “more troops, more munitions, more drones, more patriots, more submarines, more B-21 bombers…more innovation, more AI in everything and ahead of the curve, more cyber effects, more counter-UAS, more space, more speed.” Okay, Pete, we get it. Take every dollar the government wastes on people and pour them into drones, patriots, B-21s, A.I., and the mysterious curve.
And this will work because the “War Department’ now has its very own golden rule, Pete’s golden rule: “Do unto your [military] unit as you would have done unto your own child’s unit.” (Yeah, he said that). He then posed a question guaranteed to have those generals searching the darkest recesses of their souls. “Would you want him [sic] serving with fat or unfit or under-trained troops…where standards were lowered so certain types of troops could make it in, in a unit where leaders were promoted for reasons other than merit, performance and warfighting? The answer is not just ‘No’, it’s ‘Hell no.’” (emphasis mine).
Whoa! Did he practice that “Hell no” in front of the mirror? This is where he must have expected “the Eight Hundred” to leap to their feet cheering and fist-pumping their new Alexander. He was met by silence and stillness.
He did clarify: “I don’t want my son serving…in a combat unit with females who can’t meet the same combat arms physical standards as men” or leaders “who were the first, but not the best.” You know, “certain types of troops”, as in “I’m not racist or homophobic but we don’t want certain types moving into the neighborhood.” And furthermore, “No more identity months, DEI offices, dudes in dresses, climate change worship…gender delusions”. “Dudes in dresses”? Does that include kilts? Oh, by the way, he did say racism and sexual harassment were wrong and illegal. Whether that applies to discriminating against women and “certain types” in regard to promotion or closing one’s eyes to “toxic masculinity” remains to be seen.
This is the internal dialog of a frightfully insecure, deluded man ignorant of history and oblivious to the human costs of warfare. That he vocalized this mish-mash in front of 800 top military officers is as much a warning to the security of the United States as the strange emperors who presided over Rome’s fall were for the western Empire’s future, guys like Elagabalus and Quintillus. There’s a reason you never heard of them.
I suspect Hegseth had little sense of his audience. Consider how they may have felt when he addressed the issue of physical fitness. But first imagine you have been in the military your entire professional life. You’ve likely seen far more combat than Pete Hegseth ever has or will and when you speak of war you likely strike a more sober tone than the ranting, self-involved bro-boy up on stage. And then this happens.
“Frankly, it’s tiring to look out at combat formations, or really any formation, and see fat troops. Likewise, it’s completely unacceptable to see fat generals and admirals in the halls of the Pentagon and leading commands around the country and the world…So, whether you’re an airborne Ranger or a chairborne Ranger, a brand new private or a four star general, you need to meet the height and weight standards and pass your PT test [physical training, not physical therapy presumably]. And as the chairman said, yes, there is no PT test. But today, at my direction, every member of the joint force at every rank is required to take a PT test twice a year, as well as meet height and weight requirements twice a year every year of service.” (emphases mine).
Okay all you fatties in the audience, listen to me. I’m Secretary of War and I’m crackin’ the whip. Get out those old Jane Fonda DVDs. And you better not shrink because I’m serious about meeting those height requirements twice a year.
All this in preparation for his great strategic vision. “a limited mission with overwhelming force and a clear end state”, which boils down to the bully’s formula: beat on someone who doesn’t have a chance and scram. That worked when we invaded the tiny island nation of Granada but is it relevant to Russia’s provocations against Europe, the subtle balancing act of diplomacy and military maneuverings required to counter Chinese and Russian aspirations, or a host of other scenarios? Hegseth claimed that this ideal approach was exemplified by Desert Storm, but a close look at that invasion’s realities would disprove that. After all, both Vietnam and Afghanistan also seemed to fit the bill. And it is precisely how Putin envisioned his lightning-strike on Ukraine—3 ½ war-torn years ago.
But Trump and his minions do not deal with history or reality, only a mish-mash of self-serving fantasies. And yet they had the arrogance to serve this stew to a special assembly of 800 of America’s most senior military officers. Now that’s the leadership America voted for! Is it the leadership we deserve? And how will the 800 answer that question?
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