On an absurdity scale, this mindless, gob-smacking machination against a most important neighbor and unswerving ally rates a fifteen out of ten.
Normally, however crude one’s transactional, zero sum subterfuge, even the most asinine stunts make sense to somebody in the equation. But strong-arming Canada as our 51st state is total bonkers, madness without method, delivering zero upsides, least of all to Trumpian dreams of empire building. Okay, ten minutes of bullying Canada answers to knee-jerk DDS (Derangement Distraction Syndrome), but this comes with a whip-like backlash unlike other ham-fisted Trumpian fantasies. In what universe, per Trump, does Canada not “subsist as a nation” without full surrender?
Unless Trump plans to invade Canada, this stupidity is even dumber than raising tariffs (as inflation check!), slashing Medicaid, bullying the ambushed, blackmail-resistant Ukrainian president, or torpedoing federalism with a gang of doomed cabinet jackasses. By the by, only 82% of Canadians so far reject this Trumpian saber-rattling, oddly defending national identity and independence. Canadian politicians are apoplectic, eviscerating Trump and his mock proposal, ludicrous even by his abnormalities.
Where’s any incentive anywhere for Canadians? Or anything for MAGA but disaster? Iconic non-starters. Forty-million people mean 48 new House members with a strong liberal (even “socialistic”) tilt; California’s comparable population has 52 members. Beware the Senate tsunami were Canada divided into even four states of ten million: bingo, eight new senators, mostly as liberal as New Englanders or left coasters, maybe more so. Why not six or eight Canadian states and 16 senators? We’re talking upheavals that last a century. Even MAGA primitives, counting with fingers, can see what 15% more population does to Congressional majorities – invalidating decades of gerrymandering and shredding GOP presidential chances immeasurably.
In fact, seizing Greenland makes more electoral sense, however impossible because its Denmark owner is a NATO member. Would not such an invasion shake NATO and, unlike Ukraine, more likely kick off WWIII? Greenland offers tactical outposts but only 57K people, a fraction of one House seat. Ditto the Panama Canal Zone land grab, though nearly as improbable (without what – a third invasion against another defenseless “foe”?). And what bozo oversees Greenland or the Canal – Donald, Jr. or worse?
Nervous breakdown or madness, or both?
Just because America is having an exemplary, oligarch-driven nervous breakdown, taking a chainsaw to our former government, doesn’t oblige us to spread the MAGA contagion. After all, Canadians can’t have home arsenals, accept abortion (like the civilized world), and aren’t besieged by religious wingnuts at war with gender rights and a woman’s right to time her own baby factory. On point, Canadians are already better educated, have far superior social services, and quality, universal national health care coverage that shames its backward, southern bullyboy.
Canada has less pollution, thus less disease downsides, its gun deaths are one-third that of the violent USA, its politics avoids mayhem compounded by stupidity as leaders openly accept the hard evidence of the last fifty years. When did Canada last covet another country? Plus, Canadians are notorious for being nice, with good manners, and its natural beauty and wildlife match America’s. Oh yeah, it’s not having a nervous breakdown, lacking an inept, unhinged reality TV clown at its helm.
So why in the world would Canada abandon its global status as one of the best places to live by surrendering to a vengeful, ham-fisted bully? Why would any functional country, one actively welcoming diversity, science, modernity and democratic values, join incendiary, polarized, know-nothing American dysfunction? That cosmic blunder would smack of a perfectly healthy person insisting on an appendectomy because survival rates are pristine. Or a prosperous, upbeat country deciding to shoot itself in the head.
By any rational, evidence-based standards, what is in it for Canada to forgo its sovereignty and independence for changeable trade advantages? No U.S. corporations are forbidden to develop Canadian resources, considering they already own over 50% of the $2.5 trillion in total resource assets.
Facts don’t lie
Now for consistent numbers that establish Canada as more evolved, better run, safer and cleaner, more tolerant and better educated. By any modern, humane standard, it is the USA that should strive to become more like Canada vs. trying to co-op its excellence:
– Canada has many fewer crime fatalities and far less horrific gun ownership (thanks to strict gun control). The U.S. suffers very high death rates from gun violence, around eight times higher than Canada per 100K. In 2023, with one-eighth the population, Canada suffered 778 homicide victims, 104 fewer than in 2022, or 1.94 deaths per 100K. Same year, three times higher is the U.S. murder rate or 6.3 deaths per 100K, or 20K homicides per year (which was a bit lower than earlier periods).
– Overall, Canada is one of the safest countries in the world. In the Global Peace Index 2018, Canada achieved 6th position on the list of most peaceful countries worldwide. Violent crimes and criminal offenses have both plummeted from 2000 to 2014. For tourists, Canada offers great safety, especially for solo female women, among the few destinations so acknowledged.
– Canada qualifies among the 25 richest countries, with a GDP over $1.7 trillion, with 40 million residents (yes, making it en masse larger than California, the current leader). A 2020 Economic Index declared Canada’s economy the 9th freest in the world, with private industries not irate with government regulation, in the process supplying minerals, chemicals, gold, aluminum, forest products, and fish. Canada’s annual family income is lower than U.S. totals. but with reasonable taxes, full medical coverage, less costly education, and more affordable real estate. Compared to America’s 18% in poverty, only 13% of the population lives below the poverty line.
– High quality, secondary education is cheaper, thus far more college graduates. 56% study beyond high school, and well over half of the population graduate college (vs. all of 40% in the U.S.). In education subsidy-rich Canada, resident undergraduates pay around CA$7K a year. For the U.S. with the world’s most expensive colleges, average tuition is $9K annually ($8K+ more per four years) for in-state and $19K for out-of-state students at public universities. For private colleges, the average yearly U.S. tuition tops $27K+.
– Canada has both cleaner air and lower industrial pollution. Per the international AQI (Air Quality Index), Canada’s air qualifies it among the top ten cleanest nations. Since the 1970s, Canada has worked hard to control all industrial pollution, with sulphur dioxide outputs down by 92% from 1974 to 2015.
– Canada still favors immigrants vs. the MAGA demonization of newcomers. Diversity is both law and tradition in Canada and, according to the BBC, globally ranks among the most multicultural countries. The 4th nation to legalize same-sex marriage, Canada embraces diversity across gender, race, ethnicity, and religion. Immigrants are responsible for nearly 50% of Toronto residents. In the 1970’s, under P.M. Pierre Trudeau, multiculturalism was formally added to the Canadian constitution. In 1988, the Canadian Multiculturalism Act was passed, thus further expanding national tolerance. Polling shows almost 90% in Canada would accept a transgender person in their neighborhood, among the highest globally. Want to compare that with Yankee intolerance?
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